I went across the Whitestone and Throgs Neck Bridges 4 times last month. As a passenger, of course.
No jitters. No butterflies, moths or flutters in my chest. It was easy on my insides.
It’s always been a bit easier on me crossing from the Bronx into Long Island since I can’t see the bridges on the approach as you can when leaving Long Island. I can’t see how long and tall the bridges are or how small the cars and trucks look moving across. Still in the past, in either direction, it hasn’t been pleasant for me to travel on these bridges to say the least.
Since these crossings were easier last month I began wondering again if writing about bridges and looking at lots of pictures of them over the last 5 months has desensitized me just a little bit.
I’m still not happy up there and I’m not eager to look down or have the driver change lanes or make the drive myself but I don’t feel the need to block it out, pretend it’s not happening or squirm. I’m also distracting myself by taking pictures. Often not very good ones, but it’s given me another focus (pun not intended).
I don’t feel complete dread. And the voice in my head isn’t saying, “please God let us make it to the other side.”
I’m confident we’re going to get to the other side. That’s progress!